phone: ring ring...ring ring...ring ring...
mom: oh, hi.
fudge: hi, mom. listen, i need to ask you this question about my tax form--
the pt: UM, HELLO? IS ANYBODY ON THIS PHONE?
fudge: hi the pt.
the pt: HELLO? HELLO?
mom: yes! we're on this phone! go hang up!
the pt: I'M KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING.
fudge: what? listen, the pt, i need to talk to mommy about something, okay? i'll talk to you later.
the pt: CAN I PUT YOU ON SPEAKERPHONE?
mom: the pt, just hang up.
the pt: OKAY I'M PUTTING YOU ON SPEAKERPHONE.
mom: the pt, i said no!
fudge: whatever. listen, mom, about this form you sent me --
the pt (from a great distance) : that's better.
fudge: listen, in the third column--
the pt: fudge, can you hear my marker scribbling on my paper? oh no...it's a new one and it's all dried up...!
mom (distracted): it's all dried up? i just bought those three days ago!
the pt: we had rice for supper. ew.
mom: well you didn't eat your chicken!
the pt: um, hello? that's probably because it was yellow?
fudge: whatever. listen, i' m trying to talk to mommy, okay?
the pt: my guy has little arms. doo doo doo doo...
mom: the pt, hang up.
fudge: okay, so this form--
the pt: i feel like putting on my pink socks.
mom: no, we're not putting on any more socks tonight.
the pt: whhhhhhhhhhhhhhy?
mom: because we have enough laundry to do as it is!
fudge: um -
the pt: well what about the purple ones?
mom: no more socks!
the pt: oh man!
the pt: scribble scribble scribble. do you hear my marker breathing?
mom: don't you have some homework to do or something?
fudge: mom, can i just ask you a quick question?
the pt: weeeeeeeeeel i was supposed to do my kriah but um...well, when we were putting things in our backpack, chaya came over to talk to me, and--
mom: the pt! this is like the third time this week you didn't do your kriah!
the pt: well my marker has little arms!
mom: the pt, go check your backpack.
fudge: testing, 1, 2, 3. testing, 1, 2, 3.
the pt: doo doo doo...i just feel like eating a cookie....cookies are so good...
mom: no, we're not eating any more cookies tonight.
the pt: oh, but wwwwwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhyyyyy?
::call waiting from 'Bubbe' ::
fudge: AUUGH!!!! I JUST WANT TO ASK ONE QUESTION!
(five second pause)
the pt: um, fudge? that was really werid.